The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills has kicked off the season with a suspiciously conciliatory tone. Sure, there are rumblings of reviving the Lisa Rinna-versus-Dorit standoff, but only one person seems interested in that stale storyline (no surprise, it’s Dorit). And while RHOBH newcomer Teddi is braced for an onslaught, the worst she has gotten so far is a slightly cool shoulder from Erika Jayne.
But where conflict on the show is just getting started, the clothing-based conflict is stronger than ever. Below is a rundown of the best (and worst) RBOH styles so far this season.
The Monochrome Interview Outfit: Dorit v. Lisa Rinna v. Erika
Lisa Rinna slicked back her signature hair wings for this ITM look, making her a serious contender as the ultimate standout while Dorit’s simple-yet-severe high collar complements her equally simple-yet-severe bob. Still, credit must be given where credit is due, and nobody deserves more credit than the woman who will gamely tag along on a trip to Tokyo while rocking some serious pink hair. Never has a tiara been more at home than atop that magnificent platinum blond explosion.
Winner: Erika Jayne (duh).
The Warm Fuzzies: Ken v. Giggy
As the love between the two is undeniably real, I hate to pit Ken and Giggy against each other, but between the two, only one has a dedicated website (hint: it isn’t Ken). Though some may say he’s been edged out by Harrison in recent years, I’m a traditionalist when it comes to taste in Housewives dogs.
Winner: Giggy wins, hands down, all of the time.
The Dueling Disco balls: Dorit v. Kyle v. Dorit (again)
No, that wasn’t a typo – in Beverly Hills, the disco look may be dated, but the disco ball look is here to stay.
Kyle’s sparkly-all-over Vegas ensemble is excused because, well, it was VEGAS. But Dorit’s display of affection for the shinier things in life is unstoppable. So too, it seems, is her vendetta against Lisa Rinna following last season’s accusations of drug use. After supposedly burying the hatchet with her costar in Las Vegas, she dug it right back up during a dinner party with newcomer Teddi. Now that Eileen Davidson, who had always taken Rinna’s side, is off the show, only time will tell how Rinna deals with Dorit this time around.
Winner: Eileen Davidson. The woman deserves a win.
The Sleeves that Eat the Outfit: Kyle v. Camille
Both Kyle and Camille are in exceptionally good places in life: Kyle’s new TV show will soon be a reality while Camille’s bounceback post-Kelsey Grammar divorce has been nothing short of heroic. Their success in life-related choices has made it all the more difficult to explain their baffling fashion-related ones.
Perhaps first season vets Kyle (who’s still a main cast member) and Camille (currently floundering in “friend of” limbo) share a seriously misguided stylist.
Winner: N/A. In an outfit that disproportionate, everyone loses.
The Gambling Look: Dorit v. Erika
“It appears that there are two sides to Dorit,” Teddi intuitively observed. “The fun girl that I can have a laugh with – and the trash talker.” However multi-faceted her Dorit’s personality may be, however, her fashion sense has one note and that note is LOUD.
Not even Erika Jayne’s questionably high ponytail could outshine Dorit’s insane pink gambling ensemble. There’s no question that, despite the apparent truce between the two this season, their race to the Vegas bottom has already been won.
*But only because my greatest dream is to wear pajamas in public.
New episodes of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills air Tuesdays at 9pm ET on Bravo and are available the next day on-demand.